Natalia: Smells like cough syrup. Sarah: It does. Do you think we’re gonna get sick from eating this much lube? N: It does taste sweet, with a vague berry-ness, but it’s also really bitter, at least ...

In what was likely the least sexy taste test the Current’s has ever taken part of, we judged a handful of edible selections from around town (so you don’t have to). Let our scoring system — 1 heart is ...